Happy First Birthday!!

For the past little while I have found myself thinking quite often the words, "One year ago."

A few days ago - One year ago today I was as big as a whale, with a big wiggly belly. I never want to forget the way she loved wiggling her little toes always in the same place up high in my left ribs.

Yesterday - One year ago I was going over my lists, making sure I had everything ready to go.

As I put Sweetheart to bed last night - One year ago I hugged her extra tight, knowing this would be the last goodnight with just her, mourning a little the alone time with just me and my little buddy.

Today - One year ago I was nervously gathering everything, so nervous and excited to be finally on our way to the hospital.

One year ago, this gigantic, sweet, grown up baby looked like this:

One year ago, as I lay on the operating table trying hard not to shake and failing, Marquis was standing up, peeking over the curtain. He loves blood and guts and gore and had no problem watching the C-sections for his two other babies. He suddenly sat down next to me, and hard, and the nurse and the anesthesiologist that were supposed to be watching me instead quickly surrounded him and started asking him if he was okay. I remember getting a little annoyed, and almost said out loud, he is fine! He loves this stuff! My Marquis would never faint, or even get lightheaded over this! Except that he did. He just took a minute and then was able to stand back up and see the rest, and then soon Princess cried and he was over watching them check her out. He blames blood sugar issues, but I still wonder.

One year ago today, as we were sitting in the recovery room getting ready to try nursing for the first time, the nurse was reminding me not to get discouraged if it didn't work right away, that this was something that babies needed to learn and that it would take time. Before she could finish what she was saying, Princess had latched on and was an instant pro. The nurse looked over when she finished what she was doing and seemed very surprised at how good she was so fast. I'm proud to say that we have done it, I have nursed her for a whole year, which was my goal. In fact, she has never ever had a bottle, which I think is weird and awesome all at once. I am so lucky that we never had any problems with nursing at all.

Princess, I loved being pregnant with you, and I have loved every minute with you since. I love the way you can't smile without crinkling your nose, and I love the way that that nose crinkle makes your smile seem just a little mischievous. I had a feeling right from the beginning that you were excited to finally be on your way. Even before you were born I felt that you had things to do and were ready to be about doing them, that you were ready to quit wasting time. I have seen that every day, in the way that you would get so frustrated because you couldn't get to what you wanted before you were mobile, all the way to the way you worked so hard at walking that you started at just 10 months. You are such a good girl, and such an incredible blessing in our lives!

One year ago, Princess joined our family, forever changing our world. I can't wait to see what the next years bring!