New Years Resolutions - Sort Of

I have mixed feelings about New Year's resolutions. To quote Marquis, "They are good in theory," but in practice? Don't get me wrong, I'm all about goals. I have many goals that I write down and tell people about and there is nothing I love more than checking things off of a checklist and soaking in that glowy, accomplished feeling. But a goal that lasts a whole year? I'm not sure my attention span is that long. And really, if you are not the type of person who is making goals all the time and following through with them, is it really going to work because you sit down once a year? I doubt it.

But then I hear about everyone making their resolutions and sharing them and being so excited, and it gets me thinking about what I want and what my goals should be. And if everyone else is jumping off that cliff, maybe it's just my turn. Peer pressure, sheesh guys!

A quick disclaimer. I know that really effective goals are supposed to be super defined and measurable, so you know when they are done, like, "I want to lose 400 pounds by February 1st," or "I want to practice my yodeling for 20 minutes 5 days a week." Not really, but you get the idea. I do the defined, measurable stuff with my smaller more personal goals, but I am not going to do that here, because, well, I just don't want to. So here goes!

#1. Balance.

One of my favorite yoga poses is Natarajasana, also called The Dance, King Dancer or Dancing Shiva. 

Because I'm guessing that you are probably not a hippie like me, here is a little bit of info about this pose. Part of what I love about this pose is that it is about motion and stillness all at once. It represents creation and destruction, birth and death, the continuous movement and "dance" that is life. This pose, at least for me, is HARD. You have to be as still as possible, while at the same time constantly moving to make those little corrections that keep you from falling on your face. (If you ever try this pose, I suggest not having a 4-year-old in the room who wants to hug you because, "You are such a pretty dancer, mommy!") 

My balance goal, however, is not about doing Dancing Shiva a lot, or even a lot of yoga. Wait, a New Year's resolution that doesn't involve fitness? I know, weird, right? But what I want to accomplish is better success at finding the balance in my own life. Right now I feel like I'm riding a stormy wave from the time I wake up until I crash into bed at night. I have my own ideas of what should happen each day, and no matter what it is never going to happen exactly that same way, especially with my two incredibly cute, tiny, unpredictable helpers, which throws me off and makes me grumpy. It's hard to accept the fact that peace and stillness can live happily in the same place with constant movement and change, but I want to work harder at finding the stillness in the storm, and accepting and enjoying the movement that will always be there. 

#2. Acceptance.

This is more of a traditional New Year's resolution, but of course not entirely normal. It is still me writing this, after all. I am on purpose not making a specific fitness goal. I do, however, want to find peace with my own body. Two pregnancies, lots of breastfeeding, lots of Marquis's delicious food and some sedentary jobs have changed stuff from how I feel it should be. I have been doing a great job of fixing that this past few months (go me!), but I don't think that how large or small I am physically will make a difference until I can work through this problem in my head. It's strange, I have spent so long thinking about my body in terms of trying to get pregnant, and then being pregnant, then nursing, then pregnant again, more nursing, that to actually have my body 100% to myself is foreign. I'm still nursing Princess for a little while longer, but when I'm done, what do I do with myself? There's a reason you don't see many pictures of me on here, I'm just not happy with what I see right now. (Pretend that really is me in the Dancing Shiva pic above, k?) Still thinking through how exactly to accomplish this goal. It's one thing to enthusiastically say, "I will love myself!" and something else entirely to look in the mirror and just be happy. If anyone has any ideas on this one, let me know. Something to think about, anyway.

#3. More pretty shoes.

Oh yeah!! Best New Year's resolution ever!

Marquis just got me these boots for Christmas. Or more specifically, I ordered myself these boots for Christmas, wrapped them, and put a tag on them that said, "To Emily, Love Marquis." 'Cause that's how I roll. The other day Sweetheart put them on and excitedly said, "Look at me, I'm going on a date!" Which made me realize something. I work at home. I probably only wear shoes about 4 hours a week. (You're jealous now, aren't you?) The only times Sweetheart sees me put on pretty shoes is to go to church, and to go on dates with her daddy. So what is the point of more pretty shoes if I don't have anywhere to wear them? And that question makes this a bit of a two-fold resolution, meaning Marquis, you better get ready because this girl is ready for more dates! 

So what about you? What do you think of New Year's resolutions? What are yours?